Real life, that places where all the best things happen... from a kiss to a hug, to the beauty of the world all around. And yet... It's all too easy to lose sight the delights that abound in reality, and way too easy to think that best place, is anywhere but there.
So let me help to remind you just how good real life can be with a curated list, just for you, of some of the best pleasures that exist only in the world off of your computer screen!
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Good Morning, Beautiful!
It’s the end-of-the month Friday Five Faves List!
But this Friday Five Faves, isn’t going to be a list of things to look at, or links to follow, or even things you could go out and buy.
This Friday Five Faves list is going to look different from the others. Because, I don’t know about you, but I’m craving something different these days.
I’m craving things you can’t buy or find or heart or like or simply scroll past on the internet. Things you can touch and feel and hold in your hands.
People, places, experiences and expressions of style and art that you can only ever find in your real life…
Real Life. That offline, unplugged, relatively tech-free physical space we really reside in.
You know, the one we too often end up viewing not as the real deal, full of juicy pleasures, belly laughs, challenges & adventures…
That place where we can have serious conversations with loved ones, and actually hold space for them. That place where *we* too can be held and seen and comforted when we most need it.
That place filled with ridiculously, beautiful earthly and artistic delights:
a fiery sunset that captivates...
a Monet painting that sings to us about the pleasures of water and lilies and light
the marble lobby of a hotel that makes us feel glamorous even for a second
a dahlia bloom that stuns us with it’s open, generous beauty
the lingering scent of your favorite person’s cologne or perfume in a room long after they’ve left...
Am I wrong in imagining that many of us no longer see these wonders at all?
Instead we’ve ended up viewing our “real lives” as that irritating place full of distractions and problems that pull at us, stealing away our precious attention from our glowing screens and paper thin internet connections.
Did we give up on poets and poetry, on artists and the grandeur of wildly-lived real lives? Have we traded them in for sugary and tepid motivational quotes we scroll past on the internet?
Have we traded in paintings and art, and our real life memories, for photos of someone else’s outfits, restaurant meals & vacations…?
And I’m not sure when we all decided to converse in memes online to people we've never met, instead of real life meaningful conversations with the people right next to us at the dinner table…
But I am starting to rethink that in my own life. And as I notice it, I’m starting to crave something very different… Things of actual substance.
Things I can dig my hands into…. Things that aren’t easily sanitized or manipulated on a computer to elevate others, things that aren’t a lie of perfection that at worst, makes us feel bad for not having achieved it, or at best, leads to us merely consuming images.
Instead of living the deeply, wildly alive and meaningful lives, I believe in my heart, we are all ultimately searching for…
To live a life that is vivid, & vivacious, and richly colored.
To be important in our own stories, to find ourselves worthy of our own attention, and to be really seen & heard within our circle of community.
This is what I imagine most of us are looking for.
So in that vein, are you ready to, as Rainer Maria Rilke suggests, become poets who can call forth the richness and poetry of our everyday lives?
To turn your attention away from a screen, away from everyone else’s lives, — and start tuning into your own very real one, right here under your feet?
Are you ready for it?
Then let's get to it!
1
The warmth & the pleasures of touch
The warm pressure of a hug from a dear friend. The tug of your toddler as they try to hold your hand and swing from it.
Your partner’s lips kissing yours, connecting with you, passionately or even just reassuringly. Letting you know, beyond mere words, they’re still here for you.
Even the sweet kiss and cuddle from your resident fur baby can make us feel glad to be here, glad to get to be alive.
Today, use your sense of touch with purpose and presence.
2
Food & Wine - A great meal or sip…
The scent of hunger… soup bubbling, simmering away on the stove, or bread baking in the oven. The first bite of your favorite meal, of homemade ice cream, or chicken and dumplings. The first sip of wine or really good coffee. The effervescence of Prosecco as it hits your nose and throat. A Fall apple at it’s peak. These are things that don’t exist online. They can only be found in your real life. Take time to be present to the delicious bounties before you.
3
A book — A real life page turner
I know there are books online. But nothing beats the smell of a new book, the feel of crisp pages & the wonder of opening it up, of turning the page on a story that’s truly worth turning pages for… Real life books are somehow, inexplicably more magical, than online ones. And we process them differently than we do all those online images. Pick up a real life book, one with actual pages and spend some time connecting to yourself through the story.
4
A rose by any other name… Scent
The scent of your favorite flower, whether that’s a lush gardenia, or night blooming jasmine.. Whether you use essential oils or light a candle, or spray eau de parfum on liberally… Even the unmistakable scent of a waxy box of crayons, or a faint hint of chlorine can bring us back to childhood memories of summers spent by the pool or school starting in a flash. Today make it a point to smell the roses, and lemons, and everything you want to bring closer.
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5
Rich, juicy real life conversation
The warmth of someone’s laughter. A flirtatious look, a raised eyebrow. The tone and timber of someone's voice. The brief look away or the knit of a brow that's showing compassion. The twinkle in someone's eyes....
That's something you can't even reliably get on zoom, let alone a text or online message. We miss so much when we neglect real conversation with real live people...
Today, close the screen, put the phone down. Dare to have a real conversation.
Now, take a moment to commit to doing something "real" in your life this weekend. You can borrow from my list, or make up your own.
But don't just read this list and nod along...
That won't get you anywhere my friend.
Commit to doing something.
Because this what I know, as much as I have fun online, the Real things are still the best things.
So here's to seeing you, living your life wildly, passionately, quietly, boldly or anything else... on the other side of the screen.
All my love,
xoxo
Desiree Sommer
PS It's raining in Idaho today, so you can find me taking an epic hour long walk on path by a bluff in the wild sagebrush country where I live. That's my commitment.I hope you had fun perusing this little list of small but impactful cozy hygge things that have changed my home into an oasis of calm.
Desirée Sommer is an Interior Designer & Writer dedicated to helping those around her to Beautify, Style & make their lives Fun again! She happily resides in the rural beauty of Idaho with her pet pooch Bree, where she gets to take epic hikes, and plot her next big travel escapade. Her favorite things are traveling, film & anything French or Italian. Oh, and dancing! Always dancing!
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