What is the one thing that can change everything for you? Get traction on the life you'd love AND create so much fun, joy and pleasure in your life? Read on to find out!
Whether you long to travel the world, to start a boutique perfume brand, or write that memoir, the secret to the people who actually do it (and there is a secret) and the rest of us, comes down to one thing.
And it’s the hardest thing, the most uncomfortable thing you’ll ever have to do. It’s also ironically, the most fun and freeing thing you can do for yourself and your big dream.
You have to take your dream public. You have to go out and tell people about it. Are you running screaming for the door yet? Take a deep breath, sit back down, and let me walk you through this.
"Dreams can’t thrive behind closed doors. They need oxygen and room to grow. They need eyes on them to flourish. And other people to help you collaborate, work out the kinks, and help you along. "
Even the most non-public of dreams, like running a marathon or writing a book, eventually need to be seen, felt and heard by more than just us in order to get traction.
There’s going to be a point where that draft of your book needs an editor to help you see how to make it even better. A point where training with running buddies helps you bust a plateau and improve. And at some point our family needs to know that we plan to travel the world or start a new business, and my not be as available.
And yet, so many times we try to go it alone. We try to hone our craft or create our business plan in private away from prying, potentially critical, eyes. We don’t want to be vulnerable, or caught with our pants down with all the other adults in our life. We don’t want to risk the criticism of those closest to us, or the bad opinions of people we respect and need to help us get to the next level.
When people come to me for help because they’re stuck and can’t move forward on a goal it’s often because they’ve been trying to grind it out alone. They aren’t yet willing to take their dream public. They’re unwilling to do “bad” art publicly. To send off a terrible first draft of a book to an editor or peer. To run a 25 minute mile in front of others.
Sometimes, they’re completely unwilling to even own what they want publicly. I’ve met more than one person who couldn’t bare to tell a soul they had a secret desire to go to cooking school or to learn to sing. They were too afraid of looking ridiculous, or being talked out of a dream they weren’t yet pursuing. And I’ve been there myself. Maybe you have to.
"Going public with a dream, often feels like taking the proverbial leap of faith. And faced with the fear and awkwardness of failure and potential embarrassment, we all tend to fall back on the idea that we’re just not ready."
Someday, when the time is right, when we manage to get it more perfect or looking better, we tell ourselves, THEN we’ll be ready.
It sounds sensible, until you realize, that the moment of being ready never, ever comes. You’re never going to feel ready. You’re always playing with uncertainty when it comes to dreams. And the willingness to fail publicly is the entrance price to making them real.
That’s the difference, the only difference, between you and that ten year-old internet sensation on youtube out there living his seven figure best life doing what you want to do. He was simply willing to go out there and fail publicly (and probably did, many times).
The interesting thing I’ve noticed in client after client, is that if you’re willing to commit to public failure, the uncertainty doesn’t feel so dire anymore. It’s far less scary when you accept the risk. And once you do, it starts to get fun.
There is freedom in owning your dream publicly, in taking that leap of faith. Friends may think you’ve lost your mind, others may think you’ve gotten too big for your britches, but there is no sweeter work in the world then doing the work of your dream. And you deserve that. We all do.
I hope this inspires you and helps you create more dreams, adventures and joie de vivre in your life.
If it has resonated with you I’d love for you tell me your dream in the comments, or if you not quite ready, why not sign up for the blog and get email notifications for when the next post is? ;) I’d love to see you here again!
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